penelope and bumblebee

Good grammar costs nothing.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

To My Darling Daughter

Dear Bumblebee,

I am writing this letter to you because we are approaching a very special – magical, even – event, and I want you to know just how much it means to me to be able to share it with you. While you may not be able to appreciate its significance at the tender age of 17 months, I guarantee that in time you will come to anticipate it with the same enthusiasm and joy as we do. Oh yes, I do believe that by time you are a teenager, it will provide the same amount of absolute delight as it has the potential to provide us, now.

It’s called Daylight Savings, and it means that I get to sleep in. For a whole hour. Get me?

That means, my dear bumblebee, that as of October 29, 2006, your version of 6:30 a.m. no longer exists. Because if you’ll look at the clock, that one over there, you will see that it is not, uh-uh, no way, no, it’s not 6:30 a.m. Poof! It’s gone! See? It’s only 5:30 a.m; ungodly, even for a toddler.

So go back to sleep.

Please, please, please, please, pretty please go back to sleep and let your poor tired, mother have that delicious, delightful, DESERVED extra hour of sleep. Please, please, please. If you do, your daddy will buy you a pony. I promise.

Because, ok, I see I’m losing you here. Let me try reasoning with you. When I say an extra hour of sleep, really, that’s just the technical term. That would be implying that I have already had my sleep and that this hour is truly a bonus. Wouldn’t that be nice? Wouldn’t it bumblebee?

It would be so nice, and it would be true, if you didn’t wake up 3 times a night for some booby and a cuddle. And while I love giving you some booby and a cuddle, you do manage to time your booby-and-cuddling needs pretty poorly. Like, you seem to always need the ol’ b&c right after I have (finally!) fallen into a deep sleep (and for me, a deep sleep means that I can ignore the sounds of the cat’s midnight rampage and stay tuned-in only to the mildly disturbing grunts and groans our house likes to fart out all night, implying that a gas line is about to burst or a window is about to be jimmied open by a burgler – perhaps someone who got more than 5 hours of sleep a night would not be so paranoid?). And you like to interrupt my fun dreams involving dr. mcdreamy and that cute boy from work and me all sitting around on a beach, passing a hoolie and watching the waves… never mind. But um, you also love to wake up 25 minutes before my alarm goes off, then, while you sprawl back to sleep, I like in wake, trying to talk myself out of quitting my job just so that I can sleep for 25 bleedin more minutes.

And lovebug? Have you seen the bags under my eyes? They are not even black like a normal sleep-deprived mother. No, I am semitic, so my black eyes are as yellow as the desert from whence I came. It’s a nice look, bee. It makes me look like a dead person. No, scratch that, I look look like I died and someone dug me up. And I’m doing lots of dumb things that I can only blame on sleep deprivation. Like, did you know that hand soap and toothpaste are not interchangeable? I really need to move that pump farther from the toothbrushes. And how about filling the car up with gas and then realizing that my wallet is sitting on the couch, next to my lunch? Good times. And, yummmmm – that orange juice I poured on my cereal was tas-tee!

So please bumblebee, my sweet, sweet love: on October 29, let’s do what the civilized folk will be doing – let’s go back to sleep. I swear, 6:30 is the new 5:30, and you and I could both use the extra 40 – nay, 60 winks. And when you wake up in an hour, we’ll go brush that pretty pony and eat ice cream for breakfast.

I’m so glad we had this talk. Now go ask your father where babies come from.

Love, your mother.


bumblebee, in pigtails, ponders her mother's request and other mysteries of the universe.

21 Comments:

  • At 12:05 PM, Blogger cinnamon gurl said…

    oooh... what a great picture!

    mildly disturbing grunts and groans our house likes to fart out all night

    Love that...

    I hear ya on the sleeping thing, though I am happy to report that I think for the last two nights Swee'pea has only woken twice each night!

    Oh and I meant to comment on your meme but blogger crapped out... great answer with the 1920's Paris!

     
  • At 1:27 PM, Blogger metro mama said…

    I am frightened about this coming event. We are trying to keep Cakes up later each night. This type of manipulation rarely works though.

    Great pic of bee. I wish Cakes had hair!

     
  • At 1:40 PM, Blogger Christina said…

    I hate the end of Daylight Savings Time. The time change in Spring is always nice, because she automatically sleeps in an hour, but in the fall, it sucks. I know Cordy will be up an hour earlier no matter what - she wakes whenever daylight hits.

     
  • At 2:14 PM, Blogger Lisa b said…

    Sounds reasonable to me. I'm sure she'll listen. You are a far tougher woman than I, I did quit my job to get the extra 25 mins.

    Very cute in pigtails your little night-waker.

     
  • At 5:43 PM, Blogger nomotherearth said…

    Umm, could you please write a letter to The Boy, because I think he needs to hear what you have to say. I am DESPERATE for an extra hour of sleep.

    The Bumblebee is beautiful - truly!

     
  • At 5:59 PM, Anonymous blah, blah, blog said…

    Lovely photo of Bee; she is looking so mature!

    We have the opposite problem in our household. My little one has always slept in and now that I'm keeping standard 9-5 hours I'm having a difficult time getting her up and ready to go.

    We had both become accustomed to our long and leisurely, cuddly mornings in bed.

    She's going to be thrilled to learn about 'fall behind'. I'll see that she has a word with Bee...

     
  • At 10:03 PM, Blogger crazymumma said…

    She is so cute! And she is thinking 'well.....maybe....'.
    Hope you get more sleep soon.

     
  • At 1:16 AM, Blogger jen said…

    absolutely hilarious. not sure she's feeling it though....so GOOD LUCK.

     
  • At 2:01 AM, Blogger Haley-O said…

    Awww... she's beautiful! I hope you all get some sleep!!! And, damn...I totally forgot about daylights savings. But, the monkey's not on a strict schedule, so hopefully (hopefully!) we'll be okay....

     
  • At 2:10 AM, Blogger Lady M said…

    So beautiful!

    We were pleased with ourselves, because we were adjust Q's bedtime by 10 minutes each night. Except after two nights, we realized that we were so distracted that we'd been adjust in the *wrong* direction. Started over tonight, keeping him up a bit later.

     
  • At 1:30 PM, Blogger something blue said…

    I'm so confused. Spring forward - Fall back. Isn't 6:30 am the new 7:30? Oh I get it she currently is up at 5:30 and you've already adjusted your clocks.(??)

    I come from the one province in Canada that never adjusts their clocks. I only had to adjust my TV schedule as that was the only thing that ever changed. Time change throws everything for me out of whack.

    Bumblebee get the Pony. Go back to sleep!

    Oh no not a good sign: My word verification "crynz"

     
  • At 2:26 PM, Blogger penelopeto said…

    blah, blah - oh, how i miss those days!

    lady m - omg, that is too funny. good luck with the re-programming!

    baby blue - i am as confused about what time it is as anyone. all i know is that i want another hour to sleep!

     
  • At 4:28 PM, Blogger bubandpie said…

    Ah, one of the harshest new realities of motherhood: the bizarro-world effect of the whole "spring forward, fall back" time change. The good one is in the spring now, and the bad one is in the fall.

    I figure, this time next week, we'll be getting up at around 4:45. Hooray for us!

     
  • At 4:30 PM, Blogger bubandpie said…

    I should add that the babies seem to figure things out by mid-December - there's always that nice little window of holiday time when they sleep in until 8 every morning (at least, that better not have been a fluke, last year and the year before, because I'm counting on it!).

     
  • At 4:48 PM, Blogger jennster said…

    LMFAO- that was awesome! she is adorable!

     
  • At 6:18 PM, Anonymous Naomi (Urban Mummy) said…

    An extra hour of sleep...wow, how nice would that be!!!

    I would suggest moving her bedtime by 10 or 15 minutes eaach day to lead up to the time change, but it may be too late. Good luck.

    I hope The Happy Boy adjusts okay...we've not had trouble in the past, but, really, who knows!!

     
  • At 11:56 PM, Blogger Mad Hatter said…

    Here's a question: do any of us sleep? Why is it that we are not allowed to sleep. Are our children their own little terrorist cell, practising all recognized forms of torture on us. Why us? What did we ever do to deserve this?

    Sure nothing beats a toddler in footed fleece pajamas to warm up a frigid bum when you first crawl between the sheets. And yes it is dreamy to doze of holding them as you sleep like spoons, but the rest? The rest is sheer agony.

    And how do all you mothers get your children to pose for photos? Mine just starts running full-tilt for the camera, screaming bye-bye.

     
  • At 12:20 PM, Blogger Mrs. Chicky said…

    My husband and I were just talking about this very subject this morning. We've decided to ignore our daughter if she wakes up at 5:30 with the hope that she'll eventually get the hint and go back to sleep.

    Hey, it could happen.

     
  • At 6:32 PM, Blogger ewe are here said…

    Blogger died last night and ate my comment. Sigh.

    What I wanted to say was that I feel your pain in advance. I have a 17+ month old, too, and I've been absolutely dreading this weekend's 'fall behind' time change. Especially since Sunday mornings are usually 'mine'. Grrrrr.

    Fingers crossed for all of us with little ones!

     
  • At 12:25 PM, Blogger petite gourmand said…

    oh the bee is too cute! I love this picture.
    FYI>burt's bees diaper cream and toothpaste are not interchangable either....
    Good luck getting that extra hour tonight.

     
  • At 3:34 PM, Blogger Penny said…

    She is breathtaking!

     

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